Monday, March 12, 2007

Good God! I've been Culturally Assimilated!

The first few times I visited New York, I was seriously taken aback by most of the people. Everyone was so hip, or stylish, or, well, something. Everyone was very New York, and to be honest, I was not a big fan.

Then I moved here. I figured I would be able to hold my own, maintain the general lifestyle of a normal human being and not have to think about which t-shirt I wear every day. I had confidence in my ability to tread water.

Apparently I give myself far too much credit, because as of this weekend, I work at a vegan restaurant.

That's right, vegan. Mind you, I am not a vegan. However, for lunch today, I had a soy-based chicken-substitute hero. And it was pretty good. I also drank soy chocolate milk. And it was pretty good. Tread water, my ass. I sank like a rock. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go reapply my hair gel before I go to bed.